Slow Down, Get Cozy, & Embrace the Season
The world is white just beyond my windows with Kansas City’s first snowfall of winter. Specks of crystal snow continue to decorate the sky, as I tuck myself further beneath my blankets. The shift from Thanksgiving into real winter weather felt like the perfect invitation to reflect on the shift we’re all feeling internally too. My conversations with clients over the past few weeks have been a steady reminder of what happens every year when daylight savings takes hold, sunlight becomes limited, and we enter the holiday season.
As I sit with clients, friends, family members—and honestly, as I move through my own life—I’m watching the same seasonal shift land in so many people at once. The dip in mood and energy is normal. Our bodies are not confused or malfunctioning; they’re responding to winter exactly the way humans have for thousands of years. Historically, winter meant conserving energy—less movement, more darkness, fewer resources.
Our bodies still remember that pattern, even though our modern world doesn’t slow down to match it. Winter naturally cues a kind of downshift into a home-and-hibernate state. With less sunshine and changes in our circadian rhythm, shifts in melatonin and serotonin levels biologically wire use for more rest and lower moods. Meanwhile, holidays and work schedules ask us to speed up, show up, perform, participate, and stay emotionally available. That mismatch alone is enough to create friction, shame, or the sense that we “should” be doing better.
And then there are the holidays themselves—a complicated bundle of emotions wrapped in expectations. This time of year tends to stir up comparison points: past versions of ourselves, past relationships, old hurts, or even imagined futures that never came to be. It’s a season that can bring tenderness, sadness, and grief right up to the surface.
Old roles and old parts often reappear too: the peacemaker, the caretaker, the one who smooths things over. Returning to familiar places and familiar people can pull up familiar patterns. All of this happens against a cultural backdrop insisting we feel grateful, present, and joyful. No wonder emotional loneliness is so common this time of year—even when we’re surrounded by people. Winter has a way of amplifying the quiet, and with less daylight and fewer organic moments of connection, that quiet can feel heavy.
All of this is to say: there is nothing wrong with you. Truly.
This season asks a lot of us—biologically, emotionally, relationally. Feeling slower, softer, or more tender right now isn’t a problem to fix. It’s a season to honor. Instead of asking ourselves why we can’t speed up, perhaps we should ask ourselves, “what would it look like to slow down?”
As I’ve navigated these shifts in my own life and sat with clients as they walk through their own transitions, I’ve gathered a few thoughts about how to slow down for winter.
Focus on the question what do I need in this moment? Focusing on the next closest step to complete a work task, prepare for the next day, or take a drink of water allows us to slow down in the present moment and meet what’s right in front of us.
Embrace all of the cozy, festive activities. Instead of spending the winter season focusing on what winter isn’t, lean into the pieces of winter that you do enjoy. Maybe it’s lighting a candles, making some soup, or settling in with your coziest blanket. What parts of this season bring you joy and comfort as we settle in for more rest?
Soak in as much sunlight as you can. Maybe it’s waking up early and going to sleep earlier. Maybe it’s getting outside a few times a day, even if it’s freakin cold.
What are your winter non-negotiables? While it’s normal—and honestly, healthy—to hibernate more this time of year, it’s also helpful to know which tasks are non-negotiable even on days when your energy is low. I typically recommend choosing 3–5 baseline habits you can maintain without overextending yourself.
Think:taking your medication
eating something nourishing (even if it’s simple)
stepping outside for one minute of sun or cold air
responding to one important message
doing a quick reset of your space
Winter is a season that asks us to soften, not sprint. If you feel slower, more tender, or more easily overwhelmed right now, you’re not behind—you’re in rhythm. My hope is that this season gives you room to rest, to get cozy, and to listen closely to what your body and heart are asking for. And if the heaviness becomes too much to carry alone, you don’t have to.
